What is self-esteem?
Self-esteem is confidence (being sure) in knowing your worth (value) and your abilities (talents). It is having self-respect. It is how you perceive yourself or how you carry yourself. What is your opinion of yourself? Your self-esteem can be high, low or overly too high. Where is your self-esteem?
Signs of high self-esteem
High self-esteem gives us the strength and flexibility to take charge of our lives and grow from our mistakes without the fear of rejection. We have a since of balance and an accurate view of yourself.
- Confidence in yourself. 
- Self-direction.
- Non-blaming behavior.
- An awareness of personal strengths.
- An ability to make mistakes and learn from them.
- An ability to accept mistakes from others.
- Optimism (Hopefulness).
- An ability to solve problems.
- An independent and cooperative attitude.
- Feeling comfortable with a wide range of emotions.
- An ability to trust others.
- A good sense of personal limitations.
- Good self-care (Hygiene, dress).
- The ability to say no.
Also
- Assertive in expressing your needs and opinions.
- Confident in your ability to make decisions.
- Able to form secure and honest relationships – and less likely to stay in unhealthy ones.
- Realistic in your expectations and less likely to be overcritical of yourself and others.
- More resilient and better able to weather stress and setbacks.
- Less likely to experience feelings such as hopelessness, worthlessness, guilt and shame.
- Less likely to develop mental health conditions, such as eating disorders, addictions, depression and anxiety.
http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-living/adult-health/in-depth/self-esteem/art-20047976?pg=2
Signs of low self-esteem
Low self-esteem will stop you from realizing your full potential or talents. It can make you feel unworthy, incapable, and incompetent.
Perfectionist (Stickler) attitude.- Negative (bad) view of life.
- Mistrusting others – even those who show signs of affection.
- Blaming behavior.
- Fear of taking risks.
- Feelings of being unloved and unlovable.
- Dependence- letting others make decisions.
- Fear of being ridiculed.
Overly high self-esteem
This happens when you regard yourself more highly than others do, you might have an unrealistically positive view of yourself. You feel superior to those around you, and you can become arrogant or self-indulgent. You believe you deserve special privileges.
http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-living/adult-health/in-depth/self-esteem/art-20047976?pg=2
Self-esteem whether high, low, or overly high can stem from many factors, such as:
- Your religion.
- Your culture.
- Maybe an illness.
- The way people react to your thoughts and dress.
- Maybe your own thoughts and experiences.
How can we develop a high self-esteem? 
First, developing a high self-esteem takes work. We didn’t develop a low or overly high self-esteem overnight, so we will not develop a high or normal self-esteem overnight either. We must take this day by day. We have to learn to let ourselves off the hook when we make mistakes. It’s okay, because that’s how we learn to do better the next time. It’s really okay. Go back over the qualities of a high self-esteem and see what you need to work on. You may need to work on one or all qualities. But you do need to work on them diligently, every day to see a change in your self-esteem. Here are some steps to feeling better about yourself.
- Identify what makes you have low self-esteem.
- Something from your childhood.
- Making bad decisions at work.
- Grades in school are low.
- A bad relationship, etc.
- Reverse your thought with positive affirmations. Now that you know what causes your low self-esteem, begin to reverse your thought with positive affirmations. When a bad thought about yourself comes into your mind, replace it with positive beliefs about yourself and your abilities. Fake it till you make it. See below for positive affirmations.
- Do not put yourself down. This usually results from an overreaction to a situation. Just because you feel down does not mean you act like your down. Don’t give in to your feelings, what is the truth? You may feel down but you are not going to act like your down. Fight it with a positive attitude. If you messed up, forgive yourself and move on. Be happy. Laugh at yourself. Fake it till you make it.
- Go through it. Even if it’s too hard. You can do it. Nothing beats a failure but a try. Tell yourself you can handle this and keep pressing. Let faith and hope be your inspiration. It may feel uncomfortable, but keep moving, keep pressing and don’t give-up.
Learning to Love Yourself
Being at peace with who you are is a key to being happy and loving yourself. God is love and you are God’s child. That’s means love is in you. You are lovable. You just don’t see it yet. In order to attract loving people, you must love yourself first. Not loving yourself can cause you to be indecisive, depressed, have self-doubt and self-hatred. No one really wants to be around you unless they are just like you. You will attract negative people around you.
Have you heard the saying “You are your own worst enemy”, well it’s true. If you don’t believe in yourself how can anyone else believe in you. It has to begin with you. Start by building your self-esteem. Listen to how you talk to yourself and learn to reverse the negative into a positive. Find a positive affirmation to memorize and say it each time you have a negative thought about yourself. Learn how to laugh, even when you don’t feel like it. Believe in the power of words. Words can make or break you. It’s your choice. I choose to let positive words make me into the person God has created me to be. How about you? What do you choose to do?
Set a goal list for things you would like to change about yourself, for example:
- Lose 60 lbs
- Exercise 5-6 days a week (aerobics).
- Eat lots of vegetables and only baked fish, chicken and turkey.
- Cut out sugar and starch.
- No fried foods.
- Practice laughing at myself
- Laugh, laugh, laugh.
- Fake it till I make it.
- Decide to be happy.
- Practice forgiving myself and others
- Oh well, I made a mistake. Now I can learn from it.
- I can’t seem to do this right, but I’m going to keep it moving and not give up.
- I’m not attractive enough. That’s a lie! I’m beautiful. I am made in the perfect image of God. I will change what I can and accept what I cannot change.
Examples of Positive Affirmations
- When I believe in myself, so do others.
- I express my needs and feelings.
- I am my own unique self – special, creative and wonderful.
- I know that I deserve love and accept it now.
- I give out love and it is returned to me multiplied.
- I rejoice in the love I encounter every day.
- Life is a joy filled with delightful surprises.
- My life is a joy filled with love, fun and friendship. I need do is stop all criticism, forgive, relax and be open.
- I choose love, joy and freedom, open my heart and allow wonderful things to flow into my life.
- All my relationships are loving and harmonious.
- I am at peace.
- I trust in the process of life.
http://www.wellbeingalignment.com/how -to-love-yourself.html